The month of February is not just the second month of the year, but it's also known as the LOVERS' month. There are so many myth surrounding it's celebration. Come on a journey with me as we shred what most people actually celebrate in February. LOVE, INFATUATION OR LUST?
LOVE
LOVE IS A STRONG FEELING OF DEEP AFFECTION TOWARDS AN INDIVIDUAL WHICH WILL NEVER GO AWAY NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY! LOVE MIGHT BE AT FIRST SIGHT OR MAY GROW OVER THE YEARS.
If love is therefore defined as above, why then do we paint love in the colour of blood, RED? Why is love represented with the shape of heart? Where can these (heart, blood) be found? Another question again is this... why the shape of heart and not PENIS or VAGINA since most people equate love to sex or say one is a function of the other?
1. Blood is precious, scarce and sacred. It isn't as common as water, the heart is a muscular organ in most animals, which pumps blood through the blood vessels of the circulatory system, blood (love) flows through the veins! LOVE should be PRECIOUS, SCARCE (EXCLUSIVE) and SACRED.
2. In creation, the heart is the lifeline of every living thing, it must be handled with care and guarded jealously. Love must be handled with utmost care. It destroys when hurt.
3. The heart is located between the lungs in the middle compartment of the chest . To the left and right of the heart are the rib cages created by nature to securely protect the heart (love).
4. Why is love in the shape of the heart and not the Penis or vagina? It simply means that they are entirely different and not dependent on one and other! Sex should not control your love because the heart is not in the shape of either of the two sex tools; penis and vagina! Love is love and sex is sex. You can love someone without having sex with that individual.
Therefore, our love should be so Precious, Secured and Sacred!
With the above understanding of LOVE, let us take a look at other things we confuse as love.
.
INFATUATION.
This can be termed to mean very strong feelings of love (FEELINGS of love and not LOVE itself) or attraction for something especially when these are unreasonable and do not last. You find yourself feeling like you love this person for a month or two, another person comes your way and this feeling shifts again, it just doesn't last and can vary from one person to another at the same time! This is what is referred to these days as CRUSH/CRUSHES. This is very common among young people.
LUST.
This is a very strong sexual desire especially when love is not involved. It's a desire to have your way with an individual, it could be as a result of some endowments, beauty, movements, shape, complexion or mode of speaking. You have no special feeling whatsoever for that individual, you just want to have sex, a taste of what that person is like, thereafter you move on. E.g. A guy sees and wants to have sex with any fair complexion lady or with big breasts or buttocks. A lot of people, especially young ones confuse lust for love. Because a man or woman wants your body, likes to have sex with you regularly does mot mean he or she loves you. It's pure LUST!
ONE HUGE DIFFERENCE LOVE HAS AMONG THESE OTHERS IS THAT IT ENDURES. IT PASSES THE TESTS OF TIME. Others are:
1. Love doesn't hate. You cannot love and hate at the same time. It doestnt keep malice or harbour grudges. Love is very clear and exclusive.
2. It does not diminish. Love shines and blooms with and over time.
3. Not conditional. Love is NOT conditional. In the language of love, there is nothing like "If you love me, you will give me money", "If you love me you will allow me to have sex with you" (does it then mean that men love all the commercial sex workers they have sex with?). "Show me how much you love me". These are all lies. Love is loving in the lovely sense of it. No condition is attached to love.
4. Has no specific attraction. Most times you look at some couples and wonder what they actually see in each other. Attraction? No. It's called LOVE.
5. Has no regrets. When you find yourself in LOVE, there is no regrets. Regrets set in when you are in a relationship or marry for the other reasons other than love.
6. The person you love can never go wrong. You just won't see anything wrong in the love of your life. There will always be an excuse to forgive and forget. It's a deep feeling that you just can't explain.
7. Doesn't cheat. Hmmm...this is quite deep and a topic on its own. It needs to be stripped. Stripped it will, then you will understand that when you love a man or woman, you will not cheat on him or her and that leads us to the next point.
8. Love is sufficient. The person you love will be enough and sufficient for you. It won't matter what he or she has or does not have
9. Doesn't tell lies.
10. Love is friendly. This is why you see some friends becoming lovers and eventually getting married.
11. Is not obsessive. This is another thing love is not. Obsession! Obsession is a state in which a person's mind is completely filled with the thoughts of another person so much so that they cannot think of anything or anyone else. It's usually filled with rage, jealousy and greed. An obsessive person will never want to give a breathing space, most times it impedes progress and leads to violence. Love is too sweet, too gentle, kind and meek to exhibit any of these characters..
12. Is not common. Love is NOT as common as we assume it to be. It's not like water. Just like blood isn't common love isn't. What most people practice especially during Valentine period are LUST AND INFATUATION plus GREED.
13. Love is forgiving. It bears no grudges. Forgiveness is almost instant where love is concerned.
14. Love ENDURES without sex. When an individual tells you to show love through sex, please run far. With or without sex love endures. For a married couple living under the same roof, sex is vital in LOVE, peradventure circumstance seperates them, their love will definitely endure with or without it. If you are in a relationship, sex shouldn't be a test, it shouldn't be a determining factor of whether the love will last or not. If it's LOVE, there is no doubt or fear that it will last.
15. Love is NOT quantifiable. You can't quantify how much you love someone. You can only borrow the words ..."very much". 'I love you very much" and this is because love is not quantifiable.
16. Love is NOT BLIND. Love definitely isn't blind. It can find it's way into the hearts of and identify it's lover.
'CONSEQUENCES' OF LOVE
• Happiness
• Peace of mind
• Security
• Absolute trust
• Self confidence
• Rest of mind
• Love flourishes even in the midst of lack.
• Contentment.
CONSEQUENCES OF OTHERS. (Infatuation & Lust)
• Hate
• Disappointment
• Disgrace
• Rejection
• Unwanted pregnancy
• Abortion
• Shame
• Victim of ritualists
• Victimization
• Insecurity
• Lack of trust
• Lack of contentment
• Deterioration
• Distraction
• Feeling of oppression
• Depression.
Each year on February 14th, many people exchange cards, chocolates, candy, gifts or flowers with their special “Valentine.” The day of exchange of gifts we call Valentine's Day is named for a Christian martyr and dates back to the 5th century, but has origins in the Roman holiday Lupercalia. How this day became a lover's day is still shrewd in mysery. It has nothing to do with sex. SEX IS NOT A PROOF OF LOVE, do not be deceived or lured into sex in the name of Valentine celebration. Valentine is the season of exchange of gifts and not sex! Do not give your body(sex) in exchange for gifts! The one who loves you and you love will wait, if you are not married. The devastating consequences are highlighted above. You have no reason to claim ignorance! Choose to celebrate Valentine's Day wisely.
Bimboh Chekwas
IG @bimbohchekwas
Blog: bimbohchekwas.blogspot.com
LOVE
LOVE IS A STRONG FEELING OF DEEP AFFECTION TOWARDS AN INDIVIDUAL WHICH WILL NEVER GO AWAY NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY! LOVE MIGHT BE AT FIRST SIGHT OR MAY GROW OVER THE YEARS.
If love is therefore defined as above, why then do we paint love in the colour of blood, RED? Why is love represented with the shape of heart? Where can these (heart, blood) be found? Another question again is this... why the shape of heart and not PENIS or VAGINA since most people equate love to sex or say one is a function of the other?
1. Blood is precious, scarce and sacred. It isn't as common as water, the heart is a muscular organ in most animals, which pumps blood through the blood vessels of the circulatory system, blood (love) flows through the veins! LOVE should be PRECIOUS, SCARCE (EXCLUSIVE) and SACRED.
2. In creation, the heart is the lifeline of every living thing, it must be handled with care and guarded jealously. Love must be handled with utmost care. It destroys when hurt.
3. The heart is located between the lungs in the middle compartment of the chest . To the left and right of the heart are the rib cages created by nature to securely protect the heart (love).
4. Why is love in the shape of the heart and not the Penis or vagina? It simply means that they are entirely different and not dependent on one and other! Sex should not control your love because the heart is not in the shape of either of the two sex tools; penis and vagina! Love is love and sex is sex. You can love someone without having sex with that individual.
Therefore, our love should be so Precious, Secured and Sacred!
With the above understanding of LOVE, let us take a look at other things we confuse as love.
.
INFATUATION.
This can be termed to mean very strong feelings of love (FEELINGS of love and not LOVE itself) or attraction for something especially when these are unreasonable and do not last. You find yourself feeling like you love this person for a month or two, another person comes your way and this feeling shifts again, it just doesn't last and can vary from one person to another at the same time! This is what is referred to these days as CRUSH/CRUSHES. This is very common among young people.
LUST.
This is a very strong sexual desire especially when love is not involved. It's a desire to have your way with an individual, it could be as a result of some endowments, beauty, movements, shape, complexion or mode of speaking. You have no special feeling whatsoever for that individual, you just want to have sex, a taste of what that person is like, thereafter you move on. E.g. A guy sees and wants to have sex with any fair complexion lady or with big breasts or buttocks. A lot of people, especially young ones confuse lust for love. Because a man or woman wants your body, likes to have sex with you regularly does mot mean he or she loves you. It's pure LUST!
ONE HUGE DIFFERENCE LOVE HAS AMONG THESE OTHERS IS THAT IT ENDURES. IT PASSES THE TESTS OF TIME. Others are:
1. Love doesn't hate. You cannot love and hate at the same time. It doestnt keep malice or harbour grudges. Love is very clear and exclusive.
2. It does not diminish. Love shines and blooms with and over time.
3. Not conditional. Love is NOT conditional. In the language of love, there is nothing like "If you love me, you will give me money", "If you love me you will allow me to have sex with you" (does it then mean that men love all the commercial sex workers they have sex with?). "Show me how much you love me". These are all lies. Love is loving in the lovely sense of it. No condition is attached to love.
4. Has no specific attraction. Most times you look at some couples and wonder what they actually see in each other. Attraction? No. It's called LOVE.
5. Has no regrets. When you find yourself in LOVE, there is no regrets. Regrets set in when you are in a relationship or marry for the other reasons other than love.
6. The person you love can never go wrong. You just won't see anything wrong in the love of your life. There will always be an excuse to forgive and forget. It's a deep feeling that you just can't explain.
7. Doesn't cheat. Hmmm...this is quite deep and a topic on its own. It needs to be stripped. Stripped it will, then you will understand that when you love a man or woman, you will not cheat on him or her and that leads us to the next point.
8. Love is sufficient. The person you love will be enough and sufficient for you. It won't matter what he or she has or does not have
9. Doesn't tell lies.
10. Love is friendly. This is why you see some friends becoming lovers and eventually getting married.
11. Is not obsessive. This is another thing love is not. Obsession! Obsession is a state in which a person's mind is completely filled with the thoughts of another person so much so that they cannot think of anything or anyone else. It's usually filled with rage, jealousy and greed. An obsessive person will never want to give a breathing space, most times it impedes progress and leads to violence. Love is too sweet, too gentle, kind and meek to exhibit any of these characters..
12. Is not common. Love is NOT as common as we assume it to be. It's not like water. Just like blood isn't common love isn't. What most people practice especially during Valentine period are LUST AND INFATUATION plus GREED.
13. Love is forgiving. It bears no grudges. Forgiveness is almost instant where love is concerned.
14. Love ENDURES without sex. When an individual tells you to show love through sex, please run far. With or without sex love endures. For a married couple living under the same roof, sex is vital in LOVE, peradventure circumstance seperates them, their love will definitely endure with or without it. If you are in a relationship, sex shouldn't be a test, it shouldn't be a determining factor of whether the love will last or not. If it's LOVE, there is no doubt or fear that it will last.
15. Love is NOT quantifiable. You can't quantify how much you love someone. You can only borrow the words ..."very much". 'I love you very much" and this is because love is not quantifiable.
16. Love is NOT BLIND. Love definitely isn't blind. It can find it's way into the hearts of and identify it's lover.
'CONSEQUENCES' OF LOVE
• Happiness
• Peace of mind
• Security
• Absolute trust
• Self confidence
• Rest of mind
• Love flourishes even in the midst of lack.
• Contentment.
CONSEQUENCES OF OTHERS. (Infatuation & Lust)
• Hate
• Disappointment
• Disgrace
• Rejection
• Unwanted pregnancy
• Abortion
• Shame
• Victim of ritualists
• Victimization
• Insecurity
• Lack of trust
• Lack of contentment
• Deterioration
• Distraction
• Feeling of oppression
• Depression.
Each year on February 14th, many people exchange cards, chocolates, candy, gifts or flowers with their special “Valentine.” The day of exchange of gifts we call Valentine's Day is named for a Christian martyr and dates back to the 5th century, but has origins in the Roman holiday Lupercalia. How this day became a lover's day is still shrewd in mysery. It has nothing to do with sex. SEX IS NOT A PROOF OF LOVE, do not be deceived or lured into sex in the name of Valentine celebration. Valentine is the season of exchange of gifts and not sex! Do not give your body(sex) in exchange for gifts! The one who loves you and you love will wait, if you are not married. The devastating consequences are highlighted above. You have no reason to claim ignorance! Choose to celebrate Valentine's Day wisely.
Bimboh Chekwas
IG @bimbohchekwas
Blog: bimbohchekwas.blogspot.com
Nothing more,well explicit. He who has ear let him hear. Love is not synonymous to lust
ReplyDeleteWow... You have said it all.
ReplyDeleteWow... You have said it all.
ReplyDeleteWooh. Nothing more
ReplyDelete